No Names, No Pack Drill
Unless you’ve served in the military, or been around people who have, the title phrase may not make much sense to you. The internet will tell you the definition of it is, “punishment will be prevented if names and details are not mentioned.” But in my experience, its use has always been more closely aligned with, “names and details are being avoided to protect the innocent.”
The author of the story I have the privilege of introducing tonight didn’t want to share all his personnel details or those of the other people central to the story which is why he chose this title. It’s very fitting and one hell of a story.
It was sent to me to a big supporter of Unbloused, Deac, the host of OpSec's Podcast. The podcast has three episodes up on Spotify so far and is worth the time to go check it out and listen. You can do that by clicking here.
When I asked Deac about his background this is what he told me:
“I joined in 1999 into the Air Defense Artillery posted to 18AD in 2001, in 2005 I was posted to the LdSH(RC) as an AD liaison. In 2007 I left the military. I signed up with a private security company as a contractor where I was deployed on ships traveling through the Gulf of Aden. In 2010 I re-enlisted back in to the Artillery, not the smartest person, in 2016 I OT'ed to the RCAF as a AVN Tech and I am still turning wrenches. I have served at 7 different bases. I started OpSec with a couple friends as I am looking to final hang up the towel.”
In my head, when I reviewed his brief bio, I thought to myself, “this is an interesting guy!” Then when I read his story I knew my instincts were right. I’m sure you’ll agree after you read his submission below.
Enjoy!
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Back in the Fall of 2006 at one of the largest brigade exercises, which was the work up training for the following tour to Afghanistan. I was at a career high, everything seemed to be working out for me, to say the least I was noticed. So much so I was pulled from my detachment and put as the Director of the Army Training Major-General's personal driver for the couple month work up training. "So yeah me!" No names will be given.
This General (from now on referred to as MG) was actually an amazing soldier. He honestly cared about what was going on and showed a vested interest in the well being of all the troops on Ex. His aide though was a bit more pompous, he was a Major (now known as the Major) from the 3rd Battalion Vandoo's. Jumper, Ranger Tab, and had a distaste for the Artillery. So as a young English Air Defense Bombardier he didn't think much of me. No biggie, the MG loved me mainly because of how straightforward and blunt I was. Truth to Power.
So this story isn't your typical experience with a General that most people experience. Our first two days were typical, going from HQ position to HQ position talking with CO's and RSM's. The MG knew he was having smoke blown up his ass, so after a Brigade Command briefing he sent his aide to discuss training budgets with the Brigade CO. We sat in the black SUV. The MG asked me if I thought he was being misled, I told him that I had no clue half the time what was going on in the higher levels. He laughed and told me half the people in those positions, including him, had no clue what was going on! Then he proceeded to ask me about my gear and if I had all of my battle rattle. He started to size me up and it was very clear we were about the same size. Now I am not absolutely sure how he said it but it was something like this "I order you to turn over all of your gear and go get a coffee in the mess tent!". Who was I to argue with a General, lol. Now I didn't fully listen to him. I watched as he geared up and jumped into a departing LAV III. I knew I was going to be in trouble but I also knew no one was going to believe me!
As I sat in the SUV waiting for the Major to return, I was experiencing what some might call the pucker factor. As I watched the pompous ass get closer the more I was preparing for a belt fed jacking. The next part was something that I never expected to happen! As he got in and looked around the SUV as well as outside. When he finally made eye contact with me he was full of dread! "Where is the MG?" he asked. I knew better than to lie so I told him everything, this overcompensating tough guy just broke down in tears and started speaking in French. It felt like forever. For the next couple days we kept up appearances by having the Major go to all the MG's appointments and meetings, which I guess was that out of the ordinary. The Major was sure he was getting fired, I guess the last two aides were fired for losing this General. We started to bond over our grim future because in the back of my mind I thought "If they are willing to fire a Major, WTF are they going to do to the Corporal that helped him disappear!"
Day five of the MIA General, we had to attend an LdSH(RC) briefing. As the Strat CO was speaking some guy just wandered around behind him within the circle (imagine a circle of about 1000 troops surrounding one man speaking). A large Master Corporal stood up to remove this poor lost soul. The MCpl slapped the man hard on his chest with his large Bear paw of a hand and could be heard over the talking CO "Now where do you think you're going budzz!". Now everyone stopped and watched and I will never forget what happened next. This man looked down at the hand and back at the MCpl's snarly face "Well since I am Major General ……… Director of Army Training I'll go where I please!". The entire regiment watched as this bear of a man shriveled to a pile of putty, "Oh, you got it sir!" I swear his voice cracked like a 16 year old.
Now the Major literally superman jumped over troops, latched on to MG and dragged him back to the SUV. As the Major removed my kit from the MG, tossing it at me and pleading up & down he didn't mean to lose him for five days. I did everything I could not to laugh or say something stupid. As the MG was stuffed into the SUV, I finished packing my kit up and returned to the driver's seat. The Major walked up to my window and told me ….no order me not to let the MG to leave his seat, he had to go do damage control at the command post. "So how was your adventure?" I asked. This what he told me that he learned:
- that our rations were subpar from a first hand experience with the signalers.
- That the LAV III had a bunch of operational issues, when he took off with 1 VP. Things that he was going to address with the contract for the new upgrade
- He learned the truth of what it was like to be on PAT Platoon in Wainwright from a recruit on kitchen duty in the guns flying kitchen.
- He had a great talk with a private about how the Army is a cluster while on sentry at 1 Circus Battalion. He told the young MSE Op who he was, I guess the kid almost launched out of the trench came to attention, trying to explain how much he loved the Army. He told him his job was safe as long as he didn't tell anyone else who he was!
- The biggest thing he said he learned was how well our troops worked together and how tight knit we are. Although we are still welcoming. No one knew who he was or what rank he was but they welcomed him and shared what they could without question, he said that this was beyond words.
The General and the Major didn't stay much longer than that. They were recalled to NDHQ before work up finished but I will never forget that Ex, I lost a General for five days!
Deac